Sponsor Letter, August 1st 2018

Hi Everyone,

Before getting into other stuff, I want to point out a few quite special things that are going on this month.  First, The Locus Foundation is hosting an evening with George RR Martin and John Picacio.  John's one of my oldest friends in this business, and besides that he's an articulate and charming speaker.  He'll be interviewing George Martin, who has had quite a history in our business (long before A Game of Thrones and suchlike).   It promises to be a very cool event.  And, we've got a discount code for you, if you'd like to attend.  Check further down in this note for all the details.

Second, as you may have heard, the World Science Fiction convention will be happening in just a few weeks in San Jose.  This is the first WorldCon that we've attended since the sponsorship program began, and so we're doing it up right for you all.  We'll be hosting a party off-site on Thursday evening, August 16th.  All sponsors are welcome, regardless of whether you're attending the convention or not.  It's from six to eight pm and I hope you'll join us.

Finally, also at WorldCon, we'll be hosting our own hospitality suite.  It's located on the "party floor" of the main convention hotel, The Fairmont, and will be staffed (mostly) by your fellow sponsors.  Please do stop by to say "Hi", take a load off your feet, and have a complimentary soda, coffee, or tea.  Also, at four each afternoon, we'll have tea and cake, hosted by yours truly.  More details are also below.

Last month I promised that I would try to write something clever and entertaining this month, after being so out of it in June.  I don't know if what you'll find at the end of this note qualifies but . . . after the list of upcoming events you will find, for your education and enjoyment, "The Tale of The Beam: A Cautionary and Epistolary Discourse for the Burgeoning Contractor"

Travel-sized version:

(1) Sunday, August 5th, 5:00 pm -7:00 pm  -  The Sponsors' Open Mic night is back!

(2) Tuesday, August 14th - 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm. -- SF in SF presents an evening with George R.R. Martin and John Picacio at the Historic Fox Theatre in Redwood City.  Discounted tickets available for sponsors (see details below).

(3) Thursday, August 16th - 6:00 pm - 8:00 pm - Sponsor Party for WorldCon 76 at Loft Bar and Bistro, 90 S 2nd St, San Jose, CA 95113.

(4)  Thursday, August 16th to Sunday,  August 19th (various hours) - Hospitality Suite at WorldCon (see details below)

(5) Saturday, September 22nd, 12 noon - 3:00 pm - Borderlands Picnic, details forthcoming.

(6) Saturday, October 6th, 7:00pm - 11:00pm -- Fall Sponsor Social.

(7) Sunday, November 18th -- We are cooking up a special tour of a famous local bookstore.  More details to come as we nail it down.

Costco shipping container version:

(1) Sunday, August 5th, 5:00 pm -7:00 pm  -  The Sponsors' Open Mic has been on hiatus for a while, but we're bringing it back!  The next open mic is scheduled for Sunday, August 5th, at 5pm in the cafe. If you just want to attend, you don't need to do anything except show up (although you might want to take advantage of your seat reservation privilege because it might be crowded).  However, if you want to read, you should get in touch with fellow sponsor Louis Evans at evans.louis@gmail.com, who has been kind enough to organize this event. Participation will be open to writers of all levels (as long as they are sponsors), and also open to any type of writing, in any genre.  All we ask is that you keep the reading short -- five minutes max.  So, if you want to read, get in touch with Louis and he'll take care of the scheduling and so forth.

(2) Tuesday, August 14th - 8:00 pm - 10:00 pm. -- "SF in SF presents an evening with George R.R. Martin, creator of Game of Thrones, in conversation with Hugo Award-winning artist John Picacio at the landmark Fox Theatre in Redwood City.  Join friends, colleagues, and co-conspirators Martin and Picacio as they delve into a discussion on literature, art, and life in this intimate and historic theater setting, followed by a Q&A session with the audience.  Borderlands Books will be on-site selling books.  PLEASE NOTE: A limited number of signed books will be available for purchase at this event, but Mr. Martin will not be available to sign copies of attendees’ books.  Ticket proceeds from this SF in SF fundraiser go to support the non-profit Locus SF Foundation, parent to Locus Magazine, the long-standing journal of record for the science fiction and fantasy fields."  The Locus Foundation is generously offering discounted tickets to sponsors. You may sign up online with the code GRR50, and more information regarding the event can be found here:  http://locusmag.com/grrmevent/

(3) Thursday, August 16th - 6:00 pm - 8:00 pm - Sponsor Party for WorldCon 76 at Loft Bar and Bistro, 90 S 2nd St, San Jose, CA 95113.  Help us kick off the Convention the Borderlands way.  Located a VERY short distance from the convention center, we will get to sample some of the amazing appetizers Loft has to offer at our happy hour gathering.   All sponsors are welcome, regardless of whether you're attending the convention or not. We'll be covering the snacks and the drinks, so all you need to bring is yourself (and a guest if you wish).  Just come to the bar and ask for the Borderlands party.  Pro-tip -- if you have your sponsor card, you'll save some time getting in since we won't have to verify your name.

(Also, we are looking for sponsors who might like to help host our hospitality room at the Fairmont during the Convention.  If you are interested, please reply to this email and let us know.)

(If you are interested in attending WorldCon 76 itself, you may purchase your membership here: https://www.worldcon76.org/membership/how-to-register)

(4)  Thursday, August 16th to Sunday,  August 19th (various hours) - Hospitality Suite at WorldCon.   WorldCon can be a very hectic and crowded experience.  Although not as challenging as ComicCon in San Diego, the sheer amount of neat stuff to see and do often means that you leave your hotel room (or home) early in the morning and don't get back 'til late at night.  So, it's really nice to have someplace to stop, sit down for a while, and catch your breath.  This is especially true on Friday and Saturday night when the parties are in full swing and more crowded than you can imagine.

Which is why we're going to have a private suite for our sponsors, friends and staff where you can take a break, grab a cup of coffee or tea, and maybe hang out with some new friends. The suite will be located on the "party floor" of the main convention hotel, The Fairmont.  The exact hours are still being determined but they will certainly include 4 to 6 pm, when Alan will host a afternoon break with tea and cake, and from 8 pm 'til late in the evening.  We'll have coffee, tea & sodas all day long and beer & wine (plus, perhaps, some nice whisky) in the evenings.

All sponsors are welcome along with their guests.  The hours will be posted on the door and we'll also have them at our booth in the Dealers' Room. We don't have the room number yet but there are several ways you can get it; stop by our booth in the Dealers' Room and ask or sign up for the Sponsors' twitter feed @bl_sponsors.  This is another case where you'll save yourself some time if you have you sponsor card.  If you've misplaced yours, you can pick up a replacement at the Borderlands booth in the dealers' room.

The suite will (mostly) be staffed by your fellow sponsors.  We've had a number of people volunteer to play host for two-hour shifts but, if we get more volunteers, we'll be able to keep the suite open for more hours.  If you would be interested in taking a turn being host (and you haven't let us know already), please drop Jude a line at jfeldman@borderlands-books.com.

(5) Saturday, September 22nd, 12 noon - 3:00 pm - Borderlands Picnic, details forthcoming.

(6) Saturday, October 6th, 7:00pm - 11:00pm -- Fall Sponsor Social.  Join us for our final social of the year and get a head-start on your holiday shopping!  As always we will feature a raffle of fun and unique prizes.

(7) Sunday, November 18th -- We are cooking up a special tour of a famous local bookstore. More details to come as we nail it down.


The Tale of The Beam: A Cautionary and Epistolary Discourse for the Burgeoning Contractor
by Alan Beatts

May XXth, 2018

Dear Mr. Welder,

It was a pleasure meeting you today and having the chance to check the rough set-up for the I-beam you are fabricating for me.  I was doubly glad to visit so that I could draw your attention to the following:

The three pairs of tabs for the posts were all something other than the specified 5 1/2" apart.  Since this dimension is critical if the posts are going to fit properly, I appreciate your attention to their correct spacing.  Though I respect the artistic "organic" quality of spacing each pair at a unique distance, I would prefer a more "mechanical" or even "precise" interpretation of the work.

The holes in those tabs were located a very precise inch lower than specified.  Though I'm sure that you, as a welder, and I, as a bookseller, are both correct that it's not an important consideration; Matthew, as a structural engineer, does not seem to agree and so I think we should subjugate our shared opinion to his.

There was also the pesky matter that the tabs for the middle post (along with the associated reinforcements) were located more than the indicated distance from the joint between the two sections of beam.  Though I'm sure that the planned connection of that joint by three 7/8" bolts will perfectly match the strength of the rest of the beam (the full height and 18-lbs-per-foot of hot-rolled steel), it seems that Matthew, spoil sport that he is, thinks that it would be wise for the joint to be supported by a post that is located _close_ to the joint.

I'm very glad that the final welding had not been completed and so it will be "easy", as you assured me, to correct these oversights.  Though you have informed me that there is, currently, in your possession, the full set of engineering drawings that I provided at the beginning of the job, please don't hesitate to ask for another copy if needed.

Warmly,
Alan Beatts


May XXth, 2018

Dear Mr. Welder,

I was very excited to accept delivery today of the complete I-beam.  All 22 feet of it is a work of art.  In places, perhaps a bit more of the Brutalist school than I might prefer, but I do agree that the razor-sharp edges of the cut sections inspire the sort of caution that is wise when dealing with an object as potentially dangerous as a 400 lb mass of steel.  Likewise, the rough burrs around all the drilled holes convey the essential . . . beastliness of the work.  And, I'm sure they'll add a degree of security when the bolts are tightened -- much like a lock-washer.

It is my pleasure to send the final payment for your work.

All Best,
Alan


May XXth, 2018

Dear Mr. Welder,

It is with some concern that I write you today.  Yesterday I had the necessary assistance to line up the two beam sections and perform a trial assembly.  It was with confusion and consternation that I discovered that it was not within my ability to fit more than one of the three connecting bolts through their holes at once.  As a bookseller, my first thought that it was a failure in my technique in placing round pegs through round holes but, after some trail and error along with much consideration, I concluded that, rather than a weakness in my technique, it was a more straightforward matter -- no pair of holes, let alone the full trio, lined up.

I must wonder, at this point, if there is a technique (known very well by booksellers as well as by a diverse assortment of other trades) that you, as a welder, are unaware of.  Specifically that, if three holes must line up through two pieces of metal, the best approach is to . . . CLAMP BOTH GODDAMN PIECES TOGETHER AND DRILL THEM LIKE THAT!

I hope that you will be able to address this concern since, without it being corrected, the artwork you have delivered is only slightly less useful than a boat anchor.

Sincerely,
Mr. Alan Beatts


May XXth, 2018

Dear Mr. Welder

I was pleased to meet your staff yesterday when they came by to drill the connecting holes (oversized and in alignment) between the two beam segments.  I'm sure that we were both relieved when the structural engineer said that it would be acceptable to increase the bolt size from 7/8" to a full one inch.

It was with some pride that I was able to contribute to the success of the endeavor.  After returning to the shop for some tools they had forgotten (a pleasant break for me, since it gave me time to sit in quiet contemplation of my (or perhaps I should say "our") I-beam without the distractions of any of the other work I had to do that day) they afforded me not one, not even two, but three opportunities to assist them.  First, I was thrilled to point out to them that the (rented) drill that they were using was equipped with a magnetic base, the use of which stopped the drill from dancing around on the work piece like a deranged dervish.

After that, I was able to provide them with a requested lubricant, since they had neglected to bring some with them.  I did have some doubts about their choice, WD40, since it is flammable and, as such, seemed a poor idea for high temperature drilling.  But, as a mere bookseller, it didn't seem my place to comment on this.

And, I'm so glad I didn't say anything, because my silence provided my third and final chance to be helpful.  There is a deep satisfaction derived from standing by, with a fire extinguisher, ready to act at a moment's notice to prevent damage to our work of art -- The Beam of Eye (as I have taken to calling it).  The possibility that I might, if the mood took me and they didn't run too fast, also be able to put out your flaming associates was merely the icing on the cake.

I'm filled with anticipation for the trial assembly tomorrow.

Regards,
Alan Beatts


May XXth, 2018

Dear Mr. Welder,

The connecting plate was welded out of alignment.  When bolted together, the Blessed Beam of Eye is crooked.  I am disconsolate.  Please help.

Sincerely and Sadly,
Alan


June XXth, 2018

Dear Mr. Welder,

It was lovely to see you, albeit for only a short visit.  When you came to sweep the Beam of Eye off to your shop to correct its deficiency in the straightness department, I was both saddened and relieved.  I've become quite fond of it over the course of our association and the place seemed empty and strangely easy to navigate without its darkly gleaming length across my job site.  But, knowing that it will soon return, better than before, lifted my spirits.

All Best,
Alan


June XXth, 2018

Dear Mr. Welder,

I hope you are well.  I've called many times but you have not answered your phone.  I've left messages, but you have not returned them.  I hope that you've not fallen under the shadow of some terrible illness or been injured in some accident.  I continue to wait, calmly but with some concern, for the return of our beloved Beam of Eye.

Warmly,
Alan


July XXth, 2018

Dear Mr. Welder,

As I think back to yesterday, my face is transfigured by a warm smile when I think of our meeting.  I'm sure it was only your momentary confusion at seeing such a familiar visage, after so long, that drove the sequence of expressions that flashed across your face when I removed my motorcycle helmet at the entrance to your shop.  The rapidity with which you collected yourself is a testament to the deep fellow feeling that we share and your desire to not make me feel, for even a moment, forgotten or ignored.

Your profuse and rapid explanations of travel, broken equipment, tight deadlines and the sad matter of your dog having eaten your cell phone -- all this only cemented my conviction that you were not, in any way, hoping that, if you ignored me enough, I would just go away.

I will look forward to the delivery next week of our Beam of Eye, perfect, shining, and, most of all, correctly welded.  But, if that doesn't happen, I'm consoled by the thought that we'll be seeing each other frequently over the next month.  Very frequently.  At your shop and, perhaps, at your home. And, possibly, in court.

Sincerely,
Alan Beatts


July XXth, 2018

Dear Mr. Welder,

What I lovely beam we have made, you and I.  It hangs in the basement now, almost ready to be inspected and then locked in place with yards and yards of concrete.  This has been a journey, for both of us.  And now, in future, when people ask me, "Do you know a good welder?" I can say with absolute confidence:  "Hell No."

Sincerely,
Alan Beatts

Author's Note:  As a good friend told me years ago, "Don't let tawdry truths spoil a good story".  The facts above have been altered for the sake of the narrative but they have not, as much as I might wish, been exaggerated at all.  The take-away -- don't finish paying 'til the job is installed and passes inspection.